The New Diet (not for weight loss)

I have decided I am tired of my body being an asshole and taking every single opportunity to prove it still can be. I get it, you showed me how powerful you are when you attacked yourself and I have MS. You showed me that I cannot continue keto for my health because you decided the gallbladder was no longer needed. Just when I thought you were going to give me a break, surprise! Acute pancreatitis and a severe infection because when that gallbladder came out you had more in store for me. 3 days of IV fluids, thanks.

My body and I have always had a complicated relationship. If I make plans, my body will betray me. It started when I was younger and would just fall over or my ankle would give out when I stepped off a curb. I cannot even tell you have many sprained ankles I have had in my life. Sprained my finger a few times too, playing basketball in PE. Alas, I will save all that nonsense for another post.

Here, today, is all about how my body fucked me over so much I now have about 7 things I can eat in a variety of ways. Chicken, turkey, whole grain bread, protein drinks and animal crackers (not the ones with frosting). Oh, ok I can eat more, I forgot about rice and beans. I am trying to add in things little by little as the doctors and nutritionist recommended. With every new thing I try I hesitate and hope this one will not make me sick.

In my area the only place to get any kind of chicken nuggets that are not fried is to order them from Domino’s because theirs are baked. I can eat those, and even be so adventurous as to dip a few in ranch. That was a good day. I take digestive enzymes now before meals because my body is not up to preforming all it’s tasks. One day I was so excited and optimistic. I ordered a pizza with ranch instead of marinara, chicken and spinach (which at this point I was adding spinach to protein smoothies to try and get some veggies). Everything plus the crust, (because that just bread with garlic and I had already had that) except the cheese. OK, I sit down because the chicken bacon ranch pizza is my favorite and I was completely ok with replacing bacon with spinach. I have a bite and wait…. so far so good. I slowly eat a whole piece and wait. No abdominal pain, no chest pain where my gallbladder and pancreatic pain were before the hospital visits.

Honestly, I probably should have just had the one and then something bland for the rest of my dinner but I have been waiting for this since I was discharged from the hospital on January 25th. I had three small pieces and went to sit in bed and watch Netflix. Apparently it can take up to a year for your whole abdominal cavity to recover from laparoscopic surgery, so for a bit still I get tired holding up my own body… it’s ridiculous. Then I got really, very, unpleasantly sick. Okay, no pizza for me, noted.

I can eat salmon now, and steamed broccoli. A couple of baked tater tots were fine. Still won’t try red meat since that’s one of the big nos. I occasionally have a latte now, one shot of espresso with OAT milk because even skim regular milk is not my friend. It’s annoying really, I have healthy snacks I would love to eat, like cheese, or jerky made by Epic. Still advised not to try an raw veggies. It’s a fine line right now, if I try something new and it doesn’t work out I get chicken or beef broth the next day, with some sprite and sugar free jello and that’s it. The liquids they would let me have in the hospital for my acute pancreatitis is my immediate diet when something doesn’t work out.

I should be happy and take this as an opportunity, but you know what? It sucks, my kids don’t want to eat the same few things every day for weeks. So they get something else and I’ll have a bag a microwave rice and some beans or a tuna packet, at least they come in different flavors now. Some day my diet can go to mostly normal. I will probably just stick with no red meat long term though. I hadn’t actual eaten red meat in almost six years when I became pregnant and started craving a steak or a burger. That’s actually how I knew I was pregnant. I have enough health issues so letting go of red meat seems like a good choice. I will leave bacon behind because I actually didn’t even really like it before I got pregnant with our second son, and that’s how I knew I was pregnant with him.

If you have had your gallbladder out there are some good websites out there but look for the ones put out my universities or nutritionists because it get complicated if you are one of the unfortunate people who have issues with food after removal. I hear some people can still eat whatever they want. If you also have other issues with digestive organs, definitely talk to a professional because it is important to find options of this to safely eat without pain and malnutrition.

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